Hells Bells

You know, it's a little scary planning a wedding right now.  And by right now, I mean with the economy in a shit spiral.

My parents do not give me an exact budget.  So I have to guess on everything.  Granted, I do not want to spend $50,000 (which I am sure is NOT the budget),  I am a thifty gal.  You are going to pass out when I tell you how much I paid for my dress.  The exact dress I wanted.

I blew up at my mom the other night.  I think there was a full moon.  Or it could have been that I am planning a cross country move and a wedding at the same time.  Could have influenced it.  I tend to try to do it all at once and then get overwhelmed.

We were talking about the girls dresses and their shoes and she was like "we'll see what the girls want"  Umm...no.  I have worn hideous dresses and worn awful shoes.  It's my wedding.  I get to pick out what they wear.  Sorry.  I am top skate dog.  And actually, I am not sorry. 

I blew up at her though.  Of course, I felt bad afterwards and called her back.  I was fine until she tells me that the projected guest list is 300.  What?! How?  Why?  Well, all our friends and their families.  KIDS?!  You're inviting kids to my wedding?

So I calmly go on a tirade, explaining  how when I see a child running around at a wedding I want to box their ears.  I apparently hide my rage well, my mom had no idea.  She then tries to guilt me and was like "what about Kathy & Kikki?  They have babies"  Yeah, and those babies were not at Jenny's wedding last year...and they are super close friends with her - much closer than with me.  And they are doctors - they can get a sitter.  I totally lost it.  I told her that if some little fucker tripped me on that dance floor I would cause a scene.  Or if they started running around on the dance floor.  I know I would go into asshole mode.  I get annoyed at a restaurant.  Can you imagine me at my own wedding?   I would seriously throw a shit fit.  And if I heard a crying baby while I am up on that alter...do not think for a minute that I would not embarrass myself with a tantrum.

But I kept a cool tone.  I have a talent for that sometimes. Plus, I had already freaked out earlier; I think I did not have the energy.  She called me the next day and said "let's just write Mr. & Mrs." on the cards.  Yes, please and thank you.

Back to the clothes.  Yes, I have already purchased my dress.  It is on it's way to my mom's house.  will need some alterations, but it's perfection for me.  And I picked out the the girls dresses as well.  I did take one of the girls with me.  My future sister in law has already ordered hers, bless the little kitten.  House of Brides has incredibly awful customer service and are notorious for late, late delivery; so I told the girls to order asap.  I know my one girlfriend will slack.  I am prepared to have her not stand up because she doesn't have a dress.  She kills me.

In three weeks, I should have almost everything planned.  We have cake tasting, meetings with photographers and florists, and checking out tuxes planned.  I already have my invitations picked out and have researched party favors.

Yes, I am going koo koo clocks.  But this means that I can concentrate on setting up our home and finding a job when I get out to California.

Some Like It Hot

In the last two days I have proven my tenacity, toughness, and perhaps stupidity.  Well not stupid - just very stubborn.

I have always said that people that can handle living in Chicago can handle any environment. 
We have some crazy ass weather here.  Today for example, 92 degrees - feels like 102 degrees.

Oh you didn't know that in Chicago, we get TWO temperatures?  Oh, we do, as in the thermostat will read 80 and it will be so damn humid out that it actually feels like 88.    Or in winter, we have a wind chill factor.  So like it may be 18, but will feel like -1.  Yeah, negative.  And negative 1 is not as brutal as it gets.  I am not complaining.  I am just telling it like it is.

We are in a heat wave right now and, son of a bitch - my central air went out on Sunday night.  I was talking to the fiance and was like "I am hot as hell and the air has been running non-stop.  Shit!  It's 80 degrees in here!"

Today it hit 88...in my apartment.  Right now it's a breezy 87.  I am not shitting you.  It was so hot that a spider was hanging out in my toilet.  I have seen spiders maybe twice in the last 7 years.  That bitch was hot.  I flushed him so I could take a dump.

I have stayed in this whole time.  Why?  Because I could not stand the thought of leaving my cat.  I was so worried that he may get heat stroke or something and I would not be here to take care of him. He actually seems fine, but I would not have been able to relax.  I would have been stressing out about him.

Anyway, my point is, I am surviving.  It's amazing that I could feel it drop down to 87 after it had been running for a bit,  I was like - huh, it's cooler in here.  I have been cranky as hell, but you know, toughing it out.

Just another sign that it is time to move.

When Mac first mentioned how hot it gets in summer out there I was like - eeek.  But it's dry.  You can walk out without sweating immediately.  It makes a huge difference.  So, dry 100 degrees in summer and a balmy 25 degrees in winter?  Yeah...cake walk.

Have you all seen "Some Like It Hot?  One of the best movies ever with one of - if not the best last line.  I am not kidding.  I try to post a scene, but blogger is not having it today.  All I can say is do yourself a favor and rent that mother.