Close Encounters

I feel like an alien.  Seriously.

I will say that people are pretty damn nice out here.  Last month a random girl took me to the airport.  You heard me.  My shuttle was over an hour late. She heard me freaking out - and by freaking out, I mean raise my voice, because this town could not handle me at a 10 - and offered me a ride.  What?  And another girl helped me carry my groceries up last week.

Apparently, it pays to live above a Starbucks.

But I feel very isolated.  I am having trouble adjusting. I am like this big, fat, loud, harsh beast that does not belong.  This area will never feel like home to me.  I am just here.  I would give almost anything to be back in Chicago.   This place is kinda sucking my will to live.

So, we go to San Fran for a couple days and I decide to get my hair did whilst the fiance is at work.  I go to this salon by the hotel.  The most adorable little hipster gay colored my hair and convinced me to do something fun with it.  Now I am a little worried that it may look bad when I wash it out - but now it's straight and looks awesome.

He was from Washington DC.  He was feeling me on how different it was out here and how people were way more sensitive and, though pleasant, more sketchy.  As in not saying what they mean.  It was fun to bitch with someone.  He told me that the only people he really has become friends with happen to be from the east coast.  It doesn't surprise me.  I have more on San Fran, but I need to vent about some other business today.

I've noticed that I've said things and people are uncomfortable, when to me it's clear I am just being brash or silly like "why you gotta be like that?" and I get and "I'm sorry".  For real?  You think I'm upset when I say that?  I need for everyone out here to watch Seinfeld.  See Elaine?  Now love her...get her...okay  see - that's pretty much me.

Sorry gang, I am in a foul mood today.  My ulcer blew up last night and I still feel a bit nauseous (nauseated? I never get that right).  Then I was awoken by unworldly sounds coming out of my cat that freaked me the hell out.

The cats had a major set back a couple of weeks ago.  The girl started to get a little aggressive with  Roche' (my little guy), you know trying to show dominance for some reason.  Roche' was all "Whatever dude, leave me alone, I am just trying to chill out.  I'm just wanting to be left alone"  But she's kinda a brat and can't leave shit be.  She pretty much is my bane.  I cannot have anything nice because she will wreck it.  Even just writing about her made my computer do a bunch of weird crap.  It's now highlighting misspelled words and not correcting them and leaving them highlighted when I do it manually.  That just happened.  See?  BANE.

Anyway, she's causing trouble with him and the big cat gets involved and there is a freaky cat skirmish that almost gives me a mini stroke.  It's complete chaos.  After which, Roche' has not been the same.  He doesn't want to be near either of them.  He growls (a sound I have never heard before). He hisses (I had heard him do this twice before - at the ceiling fan).  The girl won't leave him be.  The big cat usually leaves him alone.  Or at least walks three feet away and plops down and is all "I am just chilling here.  I want no trouble."

But this morning he decided not to back off and right next to me, in the middle of sleep (finally after being in pain all night), I hear a freaking Puma and Lion going at it.  I think the noise came mostly from Roche'.  Regardless it freaked me the fuck out.  I yelled and the big cat ran out of the room and Roche' hid behind the bed.

I am now stuck in my bedroom because I refuse to lock him up in here as though he were being punished.  Plus, I need to make sure he gets out if he has to take care of business or eat.  Though he has come out and is hanging with me on the bed.

Their fighting is causing me so much stress.  The truth is I come from the school of pets should add goodness to you life.  I always thought that people who had trouble pets were complete and utter dumb-asses.  I never had a pet for that reason.  Why the hell would I take care of something that got on my nerves and did not add value to my life?   Not only that, but to cause grief?  I would not take that shit from a person, why the fuck would I take it from a mini beast?  I deserve to be shot for tolerating it. I am embarrassed by it.  It is the stupidest thing in the world.  Truth be told, I am miserable about it.  I am tired of yelling at them.  Not just for fighting, but for doing things or going to places they should not be.  I have started calling the girl "earmuffs"  as in she's make a good pair.

That is why I love Roche' so much.  He's obedient and sweet - the worst things he does is eat ribbons and bites a little when I play rough with him - but I let him do that.  He does not jump on any surfaces.  Couch, bed, and armchairs only.  He is perfect for me.  He causes me stress when he is unwell and that's it.  I took him from a place where he was bullied and now I have but him in a bad situation.  I kinda want to cry right now.  The poor thing.

Maybe we should have stayed put.