My Dear Old Dirty Town

Ghost bum sleeping

Ahh...my dirty city.  I actually uploaded several photos but they are not showing up.

I had a terrific evening.  Took my stroll through the city and caught some nice moments.  I look forward to sharing, once I figure out how.

I had two important conversations this evening, both of which were eating me up inside a bit.  One with one of my best friends that actually stood me up yesterday (the horror) and one with the fellow that dumped me a few weeks ago.

I am feeling so much better.

My friend is just a pussy sometimes.  He just got busy and for some reason did not think to call me.  I wanted to punch him in the neck.  I was walking right by his office and he happened to be outside.  I was like "I am so mad at you right now, but I had to come say hi".  I love him, but he is ridiculous sometimes.  He apologized, of course.  I am so laid back - I do not know why people are afraid to confront me.  They think I will freak out and I never do.

I wanted to talk to the fellow I had been dating.  He had dumped me via text, by the way, and I have been surprisingly miserable since.  I think it was feeling like I had meant so little to him bruised my ego.  We were not super serious, but were exclusive for about two months.  Not enough, it seems for the average bear to become so upset, I know.  I generally am not that girl.  I understand the casualness of dating.  Something about this was different.  I am still not sure exactly what it was.  All I know it that it felt different.  It felt bigger.  Maybe it was simply because I was ready.  Maybe my light is on. Or maybe I was just pissed ( read: hurt) that he felt a text was appropriate.  I wasn't some trick he had for a one night stand.

Anyway, I decided that instead of being all doom and gloom, I just needed to get his story.  I was taking some pictures near (meaning like 6 blocks) his place.  He happen to be on his way home from work, asked where I was and told me he was on his way. We sat by the river and we had a little chat.  It was bittersweet with zero drama; and at least I know now that my theories were correct. I was sick of hearing my friends get on the man hating train and saying that he's an asshole.  I knew he wasn't.  I knew I had not been that duped. 

Sometimes people are simply not meant to be together.  It is what it is.  

After three weeks, I can finally breathe though.  I hate speculation.  It causes anxiety and no reward.